I survive on crust and table scraps. And ice cream.
Cat's out of the bag. My stay slim secret is "Just eat crust!".
On any given day, half of what I eat is crust. Pizza crust, sandwich crust, toast crust, even Pop Tart Crust.
Since when did crust become an acceptable meal?
And when I don't eat crust, I eat table scraps.
Ah, those magical mornings when I clean up breakfast and I find leftover Eggo's on a munchkin's plate. And if those leftover bites are still remotely warm? And with syrup? Pinch me I must be dreaming. Add fruit and it's a five star meal.
I've worked at improving my Mommybrain Diet. I truly have.
I go in spurts. For months I will stock my house with healthy cereals, fruits, vegetables and all natural yogurts. I enjoy these foods, but I just constantly forget they are in the fridge.
I buy healthy foods and let them rot in the fridge while I eat Pop Tart Crust.
I need to stop here and state how much I LOVE Pop Tart Crust. I love finding these little piles on my kitchen table.
Eating a Pop Tart would be too easy. Heavens forbid I eat a Pop Tart.
As I've grown into an adult (am I an adult yet?) I have acquired some real baggage when it comes to food.
Every morning I make my daughter a Fluffernutter for her school lunch. Because she is under the age of fifteen, she doesn't eat crust. I actually find myself making the sandwich with extra fluff and peanut butter on the edges. Just because I know I will cut them off and eat them. For breakfast.
I have such strange habits.
As Hubby says so eloquently, I'm totally whacked in the skull.
This year I look forward to shedding some of my food baggage. I look forward to a full Eggo, just how I like it. Or maybe my own Fluffernutter.
Just writing that feels wrong.
I declare 2011 "Toss the Table Scraps Every Few Days and Eat a Real Meal" year.
Notice I said "every few days". I wouldn't want to send my body shock. Baby steps. Always baby steps.
Mommyhood Footnote: Pizza Crust is exempt. I will never allow Pizza Crust to go uneaten. Pizza crust in the garbage is a serious offense in my house that is punishable by Mommyhood Law.