Thursday, November 15, 2012

If Mama Ain't Happy...

For just about two years, I worked a few nights a week waiting tables.  Some weekends I worked twelve hours on a Sunday.  I pulled "doubles," in waitress speak. 

Every mom is different.  We all need different things to maintain our sanity.  Some of us need wine, some of us need to work, some of us need a girls night out.

Some of us need all those things, in one night.

While I enjoyed waiting tables, and it was very refreshing to go out and make money, I missed my kids every time I left the house.  I wondered if Hubby would remember to quiz them on spelling words, if he would be patient with them, if he would watch them when they played outside and if he would read books before bed.  I worried about them getting what they needed. 

Every time an ambulance sped by the restaurant, sirens blaring, I just KNEW it was headed to my house.  I would panic and text Hubby until he finally replied and reassured me I'm just looney.

For the record, Hubby did a fabulous job.  They did get what they needed, and it was very beneficial for them to get it from him and not me at times.  Regardless, I missed my babies.  I missed not putting them to bed and I missed not driving them where they needed to go.  There was a sadness inside me every time I left them as they got off that bus after school.  I worked because I had to, and I focused on the good it was bringing my family. 

I don't need to work outside the home to feel fulfilled.  I just don't.  Since Hubby took his new job, I've been doing most of the parenting.  I feed them dinner, I drive them to activities, I put them to bed.  I run a fairly tight ship, and I do what needs to be done.  I love being around and with my kids.  I take pride in parenting them, and there is no job more exhausting and time consuming than being a parent.

As long as I get a Starbucks every morning, and my blogging and writing done throughout the day, my sanity remains 85% intact.  If I manage to get them all washed up, snuggled and in bed by 9:30, I can push my daily sanity percentage (DSP) to 90%. 

Every mother needs something different.  Needing to work or not needing to work, our kids will blossom when mom is happy.  It's very easy to stress about money, work and what we are doing wrong.  Focus on what you're doing right.  If you're a mom who works because she has to, make the most of the time you have at home.  If you're a mom who works because she loves to, don't feel guilty.  If you're a mom who is happily home all day, college degree collecting dust, cheers to you too. 

My aunt had a wood sign that hung in her kitchen, it read "If Mama ain't happy, no one's happy."

Isn't that the truth.  Be happy.  Do what you need to be sane and to love your kids, because at the end of the day, love is all they need.

Cheers for a fabulous Thursday!


  1. believe me all.......Momma needs to be happy!!


  2. "Focus on what you are doing right." What great words that I need to keep in mind when I feel like everything is going wrong! Just one more reason I love your blog so dang much! :)

    1. THANKS!!! I have to remind myself too - trust me!

  3. So so important. And it is true, some mommas need to work for their sanity. ;) Or need ice cream, chocolate, etc. ;) Going back to work last week, I'm a much better, more patient mom. It's weird and amazing and a true sign that it was time and meant to be! Xoxo

  4. Jodie, this was really lovely. Your readers can truly feel your love and devotion to your children and family, without the complaining or negativity that so many of us tend to focus on. I read your blog because it reminds me how to love motherhood. Thanks for that. Now I need a tissue...


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