Wednesday, July 30, 2014

What I Know Now

Yesterday the baby of our family turned five. FIVE. It's hard to articulate how fast these past five years have gone.  Time speeds up with every child, and what seemed to take years with my first (sleeping through the night) took seconds with my last.

There probably was no difference at all in how long each of them took to reach milestones, but time just crawled along with my first baby.  Days seemed to take forever.  I didn't know anyone else with a baby, I was alone most of the day with my newborn.  I remember counting the minutes until my husband came home from work just so we could go get dinner.  Or I could have a discussion.  I spent my days cleaning and doing baby laundry.  I went to the grocery store and it was an "outing."  My diaper bag was filled with extra outfits, creams, diapers and wipes.

With my fourth baby the grocery store was a pit stop on the way home from a football practice. My diaper bag was nothing more than a giant purse with a diaper and a pack of wipes.  Baby laundry?  It went in with the rest of the wash.  

I can remember exactly when my first baby cut his first tooth, walked and talked.  Those moments were BIG because there was nothing else clouding them.  But with each baby the family became busier and busier...and I went from knowing every detail of my first baby to knowing just the really big stuff with my fourth.  When I think of it I feel slightly guilty, but then I remember my kids have siblings.  They have a house full of laughs and activities.  While I may not remember every detail of every part of their lives, their lives are full because they have more than just themselves.  

This year I missed a conference.  A CONFERENCE.  I just totally forgot and never showed up.  In my defense it was a preschool conference.  But that still is no defense.  With my first preschooler I would have never dreamed of missing a conference.  My husband probably took off work to join me.  And here I was at Target this year when I was supposed to be having a conference about kindergarten readiness.

It was a giant whoopsedaysie.  

I know now, after much thought, the reason I forgot is because I knew my preschooler was ready for kindergarten.  I wasn't worried or concerned.  There was nothing that teacher could have told me that I didn't already know.  Four babies in and I was pretty darn certain my kid was doing what she needed to in class and she was well adjusted.  I know now that I don't need to over-analyze everything my child does or doesn't do.  They grow and achieve at their own rates, and in the end everyone becomes who they are meant to be.

There is no race.  I don't need a preschool conference.  

Still no excuse, but I'm okay with it now.  I had about an hour of "I'm the worst mother ever I missed a CONFERENCE?!?" and then I realized I was with my preschooler teaching her to navigate sales and clearances at Target.  

I was preparing her for the world.

That's all any of us parents can do, we try to prepare these little maniacs for the world.  With our first babies we over-analyze and helicopter parent. With our subsequent babies we already know things will be okay. We might not remember everything, but they learn to be patient and resilient because we don't remember everything.  My kids know they aren't the only people in the universe, and that's a good thing.

Time definitely goes faster but that's only because our days are so full of life.  There is so much to know and love and before we know it we're missing conferences and our babies are FIVE.


Amazing.

Happy Wednesday all!



1 comment:

  1. LOVE this post. I always find myself nodding my head in agreement without even realizing I'm doing it. You are much better at putting into words what I think and feel. Happy belated birthday to your Baby. ;)

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